Responding to the Alpha - and life update

You know he's kind of a brat when you're not around.

Stephanie was over for dinner with Ryan, and we were talking about horses, as we love to do.

She was talking about Smokey. Smokey is that horse in the barn that is endearing, like an adorable child and can act like one that gets away with everything when at Grandma's house. With me he's not allowed to barge past to eat. Not allowed to do head tossing and twisting as I'm coming down to feed. In fact every horse is to enter quietly, I don't care how hungry they are or how late I am. If not they are last to eat.

No horses chase one another when I come to feed. It made me think about Smokey and how far we've come. I'm a bit down because there simply isn't time right now, not with everything going on, to do what I need to do with my horses. They need to travel, they need to go on trails, they need to be worked more than on Saturday.

Not gonna happen, not for a while.

But knowing my horse behaves well around me somehow made me feel like I'm doing something right in this one little corner of my crazy life.



And it's been crazy. Sierra's vertigo is back. She can't walk unless she closes her eyes, and is restricted to a wheel chair at home. She's missed the first two weeks of school with no end in sight. I finally have an appointment with a specialist on Wednesday (I was going to have to wait two more weeks).

Everything we've tried has failed. Physical therapy. Doctor won't give her any more steroids since it was only a temporary fix.


They want to do an MRI. And the MRI folks would like $$$, even with great insurance.

And don't forget we have her heart test coming up, now scheduled for the 31st.



And then there is the school. I've been keeping them informed and once I realized this new bout of vertigo wasn't going to go away I asked them for options. They needed a note from the doctor to invoke "section 504."

Doctor said "I don't have a diagnosis, you'll have to talk to the specialist."

At that point I couldn't get in with a specialist until the 30th (I have since called a different specialist).

Which means Sierra would fall so behind she might be forced to repeat the year.

Presuming she'll be walking again at some point.



I made an appointment with the doctor (having had all the communication funneled through his assistant). I hoped in person I could plead our case, he could write a note, I could get some help for Sierra for school at least.

He saw how bad she is, which is:

• She can't walk.
• She can't be exposed to loud sounds. Even your normal talking voice seems loud.
• She can't stand.
• She can't be in a place where there is a great deal of movement.

He gave me the note. I dropped her at Grammy's and took the note to the school. They said it was the wrong kind of note.

I lost it.

....

They've since got what they need, I go in on Tuesday to sign paperwork so she can do online learning.





My only horse time is feeding the horses. These pictures were from Christmas, when Sierra was walking. Before the symptoms came creeping back.

But if all I can do is feed, I'll be damned if horses are going to try to run around me like maniacs. There I have some control. There the world doesn't spin and dive, the ground doesn't shift. There the world runs without red tape, without weeks between appointments, with the simple logic of motion, feed, and the soft nuzzle of a horse looking for a cookie.

And on Friday our car broke down.

I'm really, really tired.

Mr. Smokey and the Christmas Parade Part One

First, let me apologize that there are no pictures.

That's right. Zero. Zip. Nada. But when you hear the whole story, I think you'll forgive me.

It started last week when Donna was asking me if I was ready for the parade. I hemmed and hawed. With everything going on with Sierra, DH in another city, continued financial challenges (because while the job is going well, money is inconsistent, and in a new city there are new expenses, blah, blah, blah), I just didn't know if I was up to managing my issues with Smokey.

Because, frankly, I've been a big chicken and only doing things I feel comfortable doing. Because I wanted one area of my life to be drama free.

And Parades? That's a pretty big horse drama magnet.

So I committed to having our truck there and probably having Smokey there, maybe, if everything goes well. Donna suggested we take Smokey for a field trip to see how he'd do.

Then Tuesday. Tuesday, Sierra felt so dizzy and faint in class, they took her to the nurse. The nurse called and said I should take her to the ER because she had some swelling on one side of her face and was walking funny.

I rushed home from Austin, my mom met me with her at the ER and to cut to the bottom line and after the five hours of ER hanging out, they gave her a bag of fluids, something for naseau and recommended we follow up with our Doctor (they had ruled out anything cardiac, in case you were wondering - I sure as heck was).

She was worse on Wednesday. I started to ask her questions, to drill down more on the dizziness. Turns out she had vertigo. Severe vertigo. As in "can't even walk to the bathroom" severe vertigo. Thursday we went to the doctor who confirmed my home diagnosis and gave us a prescription for saline spray (and gave me a list of over the counter meds).

With no improvement on Friday, I opted for a chiropracter. There was a moment of improvement, then it was back to swaying ceilings and zero equilibrium. I began to suspect that only Doctor Time was going to cure this balance challenged girl.

So you can probably see why the parade seemed like more trouble than it was worth.

On the horse front I went on Thursday, more as a stress reliever, really, to see how Smokey would do in the area where we gather for the parade. There were many firsts. Donna took her huge MFT and his nature means he has to get in the trailer first. Smokey has never loaded last, in "Lily's" spot. I had even thought last month that I should train him to do so in case there was ever a need.

But never got around to it.

Cloud, who previously has had a huge cow about loading into my trailer, hopped right in. That horse simply must be first. I looked at Smokey and said, "Okay, Smoke, load up."

And he did.

Good thing I spent all that time on it.

We headed out to the big field and Smokey was confused about unloading. Usually Lily just steps out, but Smokey is used to being lead out. I stepped into the trailer and backed him out. He was a little up, but settled in quickly. We started our ride and he was a little tight, but in five minutes he had settled down and doing well.

"See?" He'll be fine!" Donna cooed.

I felt my smile grow. Maybe we could do this. Maybe I wasn't snake bit with all this crazy stuff going on. Maybe I just needed to breathe, hum some Christmas songs and commit.

Maybe. As I drove back home from the barn I wondered if I was up for all of this. There was so much going on. Did I really want to take a chance?

Saturday seemed a long way away.

One thousand and one

This weekend it was time for me and Sierra to get out and do some trail time.

And here's the result.


'nuff said.

Next time I'll tell you about my treat stealing horse.

Mireya takes the reins

Today was huge.

Mireya rode Cody BY HER SELF. No one holding the lead rope. The trainer, D, gave her her first real lesson. She took the reins and RODE. I tell you, she was over the moon.

We both were.

She can't wait to get back out again.

Anyone got a kids saddle for sale? Cheap? :)

I'll have a longer post with pictures later. Just too excited to wait...

Headset, schmedset; Mireya and Cody in love; Sierra cantering like a wild child

Okay, here's how things are:

Jill is right. What the heck am I worrying about?

I mean, I know where all this "worry" stems from. I've had two bad experiences. But those experiences had nothing to do with headset. They had to do with:
A. horse too bucky for me to fix,
B. Leadership on a testy horse.

I'm understandably concerned since now I'm on a young horse, which was never the plan.

And yet, I get the feeling that this is remarkable the right horse - he's gentle enough that I don't worry, yet he requires me to know what the heck I'm doing because otherwise he's going to go all over the place.

And he does test, but like a toddler, really. Well within my capability to handle.

At this point, Smokey and I have two things to really accomplish over the next few months: leadership and miles.

Plus I have one thing I need to learn - better and more consistency in my three aids.

So that will be my focus. And if I feel it fading at any point, I'll call on D to help me fix it quick.

Next lesson will be coming in a few weeks (back to school killed the budget around here). I'm working on reins and legs and the combination of both, and based on our efforts in the arena today, I'd say we were making it happen. Every ride we start pretty catty wumpus, but within 10 minutes we have it all sorted out. I know it's me, I'm still getting my hands together, but there's a little of a "really? Can't we just go stand in the shade?" from Smokey too.

Anywho, today, after watching way too many Chris Irwin videos at State Line Tack, I got Smokey into a canter - with ONLY my seat!

Seriously! I wanted to high five someone. Instead I stopped my horse (with an exhale, no less) tossed my reins and gave him the biggest neck hug ever. He seemed darn glad we got that sorted out. Then we walked it out, quite pleased with ourselves.

----


Mireya is in serious love with Cody. She wants to ride him forever and ever. Remember, this is the kid that had a huge meltdown less than a month ago when she was just SITTING on him. Today she had reins and after a lesson on rein basics (which I'm still learning myself - so much of motherhood is that way, isn't it?), we headed out into the drive way area.

"This is kind of like a trail ride, right Mommy?" she asked me, beaming from atop "her" horse.

"Absolutely," I said, holding Cody's green lead rope. "Now slide your hand down the rein and gently pull to your pocket."

She did. He turned. She lit up the entire sky over Texas with happiness.


-------

Sierra is back to cantering on Lily. That horse loves that kid. I wish you could see how Lily acts with her. She bits up best with Sierra - the rest of us have to cajole. She's stopped doing the rushing canter (no doubt a combo of light requests and just getting in shape).

Sierra sits beautifully and I think of the lessons she's had. She's a natural athlete (which she got from her dad), but those lessons gave her a great foundation.

I gotta get me some of those lessons. :)



Hope your weekend was equine filled...

Scenes of Summer's End

Practice...

Down by the river

Growing up so quick

Finding more than courage. Finding a friend.

Riding a dream and finding our way

This is Cody. and he made one dream come true today. There's my daughter's best friend on his back.

And here's Lily in mid grass grab.

Lily is always careful around kids.

Mireya riding Cody, the Wonder Horse

Mireya, who the last time I tried to get to overcome her fear had a major meltdown, faced her fear today. And rode one whole circle.

It helped immensely that her best friend rode and Cody plodded happily along.

Cody has been passed around quite a bit in his life and I often wonder about what his life has been like. He's not a total dead head. He'll canter when called upon and, more importantly, plod when a scared little girl is riding.

Thank you Cody.

Today was Lily's first day out of the stall and boy, did it show in the round pen. Bucking, tiny little rears, charging around. I hope the fact we were working in the round pen made it "light work." But it's such a relief to see her feeling better.

Then it was time to take the next step.

Today I played with Smokey.

We worked in the round pen. Couldn't quite get the join up and since the kids were around I couldn't really focus on it. He did well, though, and I worked him through his gaits.

We lead around a bit. Very well behaved.

Then it was time for a ride...

Which I'll write about tomorrow...

Hands goes Western!

Okay, this is the third in the series. Can you tell when we started to have problems with our actress?

Cody is the quiet horse that was in the parade. He's now at the barn and I'm thinking he'll make a good back up horse for us...