Saturday, January 17, 2009

20 Reasons Horseback riding is better than sex


I found this on an email list I'm on and just had to share (and add a few of my own, natch).

Feel free to add your own ideas... Somehow I think there will be many...

20. No one looks at you strange if you wear spurs and carry a crop.

19. You can wear your riding clothes in public.

18. You don't have to sneak your riding magazines into the house.

17. If you have trouble with riding, it is perfectly acceptable to pay a professional to show you how to improve your technique.

16. The Ten Commandments don't say anything about riding.

15. If your trainer takes videotapes of you riding, you don't have to worry about them showing up on the internet if you become famous.

14. Your horse won't keep asking questions about other horses you've ridden.

13. If is perfectly acceptable to ride a horse you have never met before, just once, or to ride many horses in the same day, whether you know them or not.

12. When you see a really good looking horse, you don't have to feel guilty about imagining riding him/her.

11. If your regular horse isn't available, no one objects if you ride another horse.

10. Noone can ever tell you that you can go blind if you ride by yourself.

9. When dealing with a riding professional, you never have to wonder if they are really an undercover cop.

8. You don't have to go to a sleazy shop in a seedy neighbor to buy riding stuff.

7. You can have a riding calendar on your wall in the office, tell riding jokes, and invite co-workers to ride with you without getting sued for harassment.

6. There is no such thing as a Riding Transmitted Disease.

5. If you have to watch horses on television, you don't have to subscribe to a premium cable channel.

4. Nobody expects you to promise to ride the same horse for the rest of your life.

3. Nobody expects you to give up riding if your equine partner loses interest in the sport.

2. You don't have to be a newlywed to plan a vacation primarily for the enjoyment of riding.

1. Your horse will never say, "WHAT? You just rode me last week! Is that all you ever think about?"

5 comments:

Mrs Mom said...

LOL! I love it! Only thing I can think to add is, you can't get pregnant from an quick afternoon ride ;)

20 meter circle of life said...

too funny. my addition:
you really can go bareback and have no worries

Melanie said...

OMG!!! This is just too funny! I am not good at coming up with quick things to add, but I love Mrs. Mom and Jewel's additions! :0

EquineVIP said...

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Michelle said...

This is hysterical! Definitely very clever!